I never knew i could ever feel this way about anyone; let alone him. It is as if he is my muse; my reason for a sane life; my universe. No combination of words can ever justify my love for him. Lyinh beside me , he has no idea how much i adore him. I so want to just pull him close and for once get lost in those stormy black eyes. My fingers itch to run down his torso and feel his muscles beneath my skin. It’s been too damn long since i have been having these dreams of him. But, its just not sex that i want. I want him, his heart, his soul, his mind; everything. I know it is something that probably i won’t be getting anytime soon. I don’t know this thing between us ; its different. I have never felt this before. This is some sort of pure , untouched , spiritual love ; the one where you just want to give your lover the entire universe and still want nothing in return except his smile. Yes, you got me right, the same love. I am sure you would have also felt it for someone someday. And its such a beautiful feeling that it swipes you off your feet, like you just wanna dance and sing, there is nothing evil in the world, as if you probably attained that nirvana you have been searching around. But, this is not a fairytale and i am no princess. The harsh reality being he hasn’t said anything yet. I don’t even know fhat our moments in bed together mean anything to him or not ! Or whether he loves me or noe! Or he sees his future in me or not! Or if he wants me for more than my body or not ! And the most pathetic part being; even if the answers to my questions are NO ; probably then as well i would be lying this way in his bed; pretending to be happy and pouring the world at his feet. 

Comments

Anonymous said…
Knowing the truth still falling for something called love, ready to be happy in bed with him but forgetting what you actully deserve. Get things clear and be satisfied than crying again and thinking of your worst nights.
20 March 2018 at 14:40
Prashant Singh Rathore said…
It's not about being crying or being a stupid at thoughts.
Impressive perception of the writer everyone should follow.
This is an example of taking risk and if you can't task risk life will fuck anything and everything for you and make you cry.

When you see a big dog hole or hurdles in your path and you wanna make it at any cost even after knowing the high failure rate then you can win or else
You have lost the battle in your head only. She is an inspiration for others, learning her would give you people goosebumps
28 June 2019 at 18:46
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The virgin slave #2

I am supposed to be completing my assignment right now. But , here I am; still thinking about that angelic face . Her mesmerizing eyes left me wanting for more. The condition is much more critical with me since I haven't dated in what feels like years. You see, the problem with me is I am a very, very private guy. And one thing I assure you is that I never play with emotions. And since I am busy sorting my life, I haven't been on the market for long enough. Dating a girl is not just going out with her and having fun. It's meant to be some serious shit, and serious shit is what I never mastered! Flings and one-nights are more of my thing. The problem is when you date, you germinate a bond. Bonds come with responsibilities, and those responsibilities just fuck with your brains. No offense, but I cannot take that risk just right now. Life's already been messier enough with my graduation and family issues. To top it all, I am not a guy, a girl can easily handle and I know ...
Read more
 I do not remember the last time I had been happy. It feels like a distant memory, a fading light in the stormy night. Days after days, the sadness and the grief have piled up. The thing is that till now I have always thought that all this would end one day. Somehow, all the pain will ease away, leaving peace in its wake. However, peace now seems a rare luxury, only to be found nowhere. In the past, I have tried all the solutions and worked on all my weaknesses, mended all the broken pathways. I still cannot seem to reach a place where I can finally let go of my sad self and embrace a happier version of me. All my life, I have hurt by people around me. My trust has been broken more times than one can possibly count. I have been left alone in the dark times. Every time I feel a hand will come out of my darkness and pull me back to life, I have been wrong. Never has anyone felt the need to stop on the track and ask me if I were okay. Over time, this kept on multiplying and growing tr...
Read more
It was all magical untill he left. I was broken , shattered into a million tiny pieces. I went closer to his heart just to fix it up with my love and it turns out that i am now left with a heart that has been hurt like never before. It just wasn’t the power to love , to trust someone , to support someone that he took away; rather it was the crushed self confidence boxed up and thrown away in the depths of darkness . But as they say, life never stops no matter what. Time passed . Over the days, it became easier for me to endure everything. I wont say i wasn’t hurting . I was . I still am. But, somewhere i think i have now become habitual of that numbing pain. After he left, i tried to go out. Tried mingling up with people, dated guys, had rowdy nights. However, today as i lie down in the arms of another man, all i can think about is him. All i miss is his smell, the way he used to play with my bangs, the soft blow of his breath over my face. His smile still haunts me. The goosebumps w...
Read more